A Lifetime Endeavour (Part 1)
In one of the monastic rules of conduct, monks are forbidden
from calling out loudly when they want to get other monks’ attention. They
should instead signal with their hands because the Lord Buddha wanted them to
have a quiet environment to meditate. During Lord Buddha’s time, the monks took
up meditation as their lifetime endeavor. But nowadays, most of the monks and
the laity don’t. The Lord Buddha and the noble disciples or sāvakas taught only
the practice of walking and sitting meditation, the places that were suitable
for the meditation practices and the methods used to eliminate the kilesas, taṇhā
and āsava. The main topics of conversation that the monks had during the Lord
Buddha’s time were the sallekha-dhamma, which means cleansing or purifying. It’s
the cleansing of the kilesas from their conduct, speech and thought. They
should only be talking about cleansing and eliminating the kilesas because they
took up the robe for this purpose and not to accumulate the kilesas.
Right now you only have the appearance of one who has gone
forth. Originally, going forth was for the purpose of destroying all the
kilesas, taṇhā and āsava. If you believe in this ideal, but are not doing any
practice, you’ll instead accumulate more kilesas and defy the Dhamma-vinaya. As
a practitioner, you must strictly adhere to the Dhamma teaching that has been
recorded in the scriptures and use it as your guide. The purpose of recording
and preserving the Lord Buddha’s teaching is to serve as a guiding light for
those who are interested in the practice of mental development. Had it not been
recorded, you wouldn’t know how the Lord Buddha and the noble disciples
practiced and became enlightened. Nowadays, you only study the scriptures and
do not do any practice. All that you have learned are the descriptions of the
magga, phala and Nibbāna. If your goal in studying the scriptures and
practicing mental development is to become a famous guru, you’ll unknowingly
accumulate more kilesas and reject the goal set for you by the Lord Buddha. You
should seriously think about this.
You shouldn’t rely solely on your teacher’s instruction
because it’s not enough to make you wise. How do you become wise? You have to
do a lot of investigation, analysis and reflection and be always mindful of the
sense objects that come into contact with your eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body
and heart. If you don’t use your sati and paññā, you’ll never gain any wisdom.
The Lord Buddha and the sāvakas gained wisdom through their sati, paññā, saddhā
and viriya. They didn’t become wise by being idle and hopeless. When doing
walking meditation, they didn’t let their mind think aimlessly like the way
you’re doing, which is no different from people who don’t practice walking
meditation. Sati and paññā connect to form a formidable weapon to free your
heart from the kilesas’ oppression. Saddhā is the belief in the magga and
phala, and the belief that having faithfully followed the Lord Buddha’s
teaching, you’ll become enlightened. You should always practice with diligent
effort or viriya to develop your sati or mindfulness and investigate with
paññā. If you always maintain your diligent effort, you’ll never get tired of
fighting the kilesas or be discouraged from developing your sati and paññā.
The citta is the real thing. The body is merely a
phenomenon. When you practice meditation whilst walking back and forth without
any mindfulness, you’re like people who go for a stroll, not like someone who
practices meditation. But you’re worse than them if you practice walking
meditation without any mindfulness. You mustn’t walk like that. The Lord
Buddha’s teaching, which has been recorded in the scriptures, can be very
useful for your practice if you reflect on it with your sati and paññā.
However, usually you don’t reflect on it but merely chant it like a parrot
chirping: ‘Precious stone, precious stone...’ When you give a parrot a precious
stone, it doesn’t know what to do with it because it only knows about fruits
such as bananas. You’re like a parrot because you don’t know the perils
inherent in the kilesas, taṇhā and āsava that you’re passionately obsessed with
and never seem to have enough of. You also don’t know the worth of Dhamma which
is like a precious stone. That’s why you never want to have anything to do with
the Dhamma, like applying your diligent effort.
When you do walking meditation, your knees become weak and
when you do sitting meditation it seems as if your bones and your body are
bursting apart. When you develop sati and investigate with paññā to remove the
harmful kilesas, you become weak and discouraged and let the kilesas trample
all over you and knock you out. All you can think is “This is hopeless. I have
been striving so hard but I can never enter into calm.” So while you’re doing
walking or sitting meditation, your practice just turns in the kilesas’ favor
because it’s being driven by the kilesas, not by the Dhamma. So how can you
ever become enlightened? This is the way you should reflect if you want to
gauge your success or failure. If you think with paññā, you’ll know how far
you’ve progressed in your practice. You should think “Today I have walked and
sat in meditation. How were my citta and satipaññā? Did I merely walk like
people going for a stroll or sit casually? When people sit casually, it’s not
as bad as when I sit hopelessly and unmindfully. When I meditate, I should be
striving for freedom from dukkha and should always remind myself of this goal.”
You mustn’t be complacent because there’s no reason in this world for you to be
so.
The Lord Buddha had always taught you to refrain from
acquiring worldly possessions and pleasures because they are like fire. He said
that they are all aniccaṁ, dukkhaṁ and anattā, and are all unreliable, so you
mustn’t be attached to them. If you cling to them, it’ll be like clinging to
fire. The correct way to deal with them is to always reflect on their aniccaṁ,
dukkhaṁ and anattā nature. If you’re attached to them you’ll always be
afflicted with dukkha. The intensity of dukkha varies with the intensity of
your attachment. There is no other endeavor for you but the practice of sitting
and walking meditation. You should always watch your heart with satipaññā if
you want to catch the kilesas’ tricks and deceptions because satipaññā is an
indispensable tool for catching them. With satipaññā you’ll always detect the
kilesas in whatever form they might appear in the heart, be it raga or dosa,
lust or anger, because the heart is the one who knows and satipaññā is the one
who analyzes. You have to focus your attention at the heart in order to see the
cause and the effect of dukkha. But you mustn’t merely wish them to disappear,
for this is taṇhā or craving. If you want dukkha to vanish, you’ll have to find
and remove the cause of dukkha. Otherwise, dukkha will not disappear, but will
intensify to the point where you won’t be able to endure it. For this reason,
it’s absolutely vital for you to watch your heart.
I’ve tried my best to provide you with the opportunity to
practice. I’m very protective of you and really care for you. I truly cherish
the reclusive life and the meditation practice which I’ve devoted my entire
life to. The results are really satisfying because it released me from dukkha
after I eliminated all of the kilesas from my heart with my satipaññā,
something not beyond your own ability. I’d really like to see you realize all
levels of Dhamma attainments, beginning with samādhi. What is samādhi really
like? What kind of calm and coolness? If satipaññā is constantly focused at the
citta and observing it, then the citta won’t have time to produce any harmful
thoughts to hurt you and will eventually enter into calm. When the citta
becomes reckless and stubborn, then you must use the various techniques of
satipaññā to restrain it because satipaññā is superior to the kilesas. This is
paññā develops samādhi. When the kilesas are extremely wild, you must put all
of your effort into taming the citta. It’s a life and death situation. You must
subdue the kilesas with your satipaññā until the citta withdraws inside and
calms down.
I can confidently relate to you the experience realized from
my meditation practice. When the citta became very reckless with lust or rāga,
I had to subdue it with my satipaññā until I was in tears before I could see
its harmfulness. When I sat for a long time until the pain became very
excruciating, I had to use satipaññā to investigate the body. If I was using a
mantra or being mindful of my breathing I had to stop doing it when the
dukkha-vedanā attacked with its full force. I had to continually investigate
dukkha-vedanā with my satipaññā like two boxers punching each other. You can’t
afford to be off-guard because when you are, you’ll be vulnerable. It’s the
same way with your investigation. You must probe and analyze until you find and
eliminate the cause of dukkha. After you’ve achieved this, how can the citta’s
spectacular nature not appear? There is nothing in this world that could be
more spectacular than a developed citta. On the other hand, there is nothing in
this world that could be worse than an undeveloped citta. The citta is very
important because it’s the indispensable container for all the different levels
of Dhamma, especially the magga, phala and Nibbāna. You must, therefore, strive
to develop the citta.
When you fast, you should really concentrate on your
meditation practice. Your exertion should be more strenuous than it would
normally be. Fasting or reducing your food intake is a means of developing your
mindfulness, or sati. If fasting suits you, it’ll make your practice easier and
more fruitful than when you eat normally. If it doesn’t suit you, it won’t help
your practice, because you’ll be thinking about food all the time rather than
about your practice. When you fast your body will become light, your citta
nimble and alert, your mindfulness ever-present, and you will experience no
sleepiness. You’ll see that your sleepiness comes from eating a lot of food.
After fasting for two or three days, there’ll be no drowsiness left. You’ll sit
erect like a post, and your citta will enter into calm very easily. There is
nothing to bother your citta. When you develop paññā, it will flow very easily,
spinning round and round. Regardless of the Dhamma level you’re in, the methods
of practice like fasting will always promote your progress, if they suit your
temperament. If they don’t, they will become a hindrance.
You shouldn’t speculate about things that you haven’t yet
experienced in your heart, like imagining what khaṇika samādhi is like, what
upacāra samādhi is like, what appanā samādhi is like, or what the citta’s
convergence into complete concentration is like. This is just imagination that
will lead you away from the heart who is the one to experience and develop
them, be it any kind of samādhi. The point is never to speculate what khaṇika
samādhi, upacāra samādhi or appanā samādhi are like, other than experiencing
the truth of these samādhis yourself because this is the correct way to do it.
It’s like describing what a particular dish of food is like. Whether it’s sweet
or not really doesn’t matter. Even a child who hasn’t had any schooling about
culinary matters will know if the food is delicious or not when he eats it.
It’s the same with samādhi. You have to experience it by developing it
yourself. It doesn’t depend on your speculation; that is useless and wastes
your time. Be it any kind of samādhi, you’ll get to know it yourself. You’ll
know what kind of samādhi suits you when you’ve developed it with your
mindfulness and strenuous effort. After you’ve entered into calm, you’ll know
what it’s like and how to achieve it.
Normally the citta likes to think a lot because it’s always
restless and agitated like a monkey. But when you’ve developed sati to control
your citta, like when you’ve continually concentrated on your mantra or any
other meditation object, then the citta won’t have the chance to think
aimlessly and will calm down. Whatever kind of calm it may be, you’ll know it,
as well as the happiness, ease and comfort that accompany it, be it khaṇika,
upacāra or appanā. The important point is never to speculate about them,
because it’s a waste of time and a hindrance to your meditation practice,
especially when you’re investigating for the truth. What you’ve studied from
the scriptures or heard from your teacher, are all speculation. If you apply it
in your investigation, you’ll ruin it and never become enlightened. The citta
will unknowingly think that it’s the truth. Therefore, you mustn’t let your
speculation interfere with your investigation. If you want to become
enlightened, you must always attentively watch your citta. You’re practicing
cittabhāvanā or mental development. You’re not practicing for the development
of mental delusion. If you constantly study the citta, you’ll clearly see that
the citta is the knowingness or “the one who knows.”
(Ajahn Maha Boowa “Forest Desanas”)
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